Gooood Morning!

Ahh the day after Memorial Day. Leftovers!! We had a very nice day yesterday.

Two years ago for Christmas I bought Rob a smoker to go along with his collection of outdoor cooking accessories. Well for the last two years said smoker has been sitting in it's box in the shed. Fast forward to last week where Rob sees on a show on how REALLY EASY it is to smoke food. So he decides to try it with some ribs we had in the freezer. After putting it together he reads that we need to go buy chips for it, so off to Wally world we go.

Rob seasons the smoker late Sunday night and the whole house smells gooooood. I can't wait for Monday afternoon.

Yesterday we had our home church over for a potluck. Rob did ribs in the smoker and chickens in the rotiserre, everyone else brought potato salad, broccoli cauliflower salad, chips, salad, baked beans, yummy food. The weather was perfect and the kids did great. By the time everyone left I still felt relaxed. Rob and I kept saying how nice the day was. We realized later that I never took a single picture to document the day. Rob asked me what kind of photographer did I think I was. I said one who took the day off obviously. (picture was from last year)

GREAT NEWS!! Mom passed her accounting class! Now she has one more class this summer and then she will GRADUATE!!! Plans for a huge party this fall, oh yeah we are gonna par- tey!!

Life returns semi-back to normal today. Laundry, dishes, refereeing kids, making lunches, changing diapers, reheating yummy leftovers.

I hope you enjoyed your weekend!

I would like to thank the blog www.Ilovemythreesons.blogspot for this super cute idea to give to my daughters teacher. The card was inspired by one I saw on the two peas gallery by melibean. I had some KI Memories school papers that I had been hoarding that were just perfect for this project. I didn't copy anyone exactly but it was kind of close. The card is signed by Kelly and also has a $25 visa gift card in it.
Remember you can always click on a picture to make it bigger.




One project ticked off my list. I still need to:
Edit Pops wedding photos, make invites for Chelsea's 1st birthday, make the banner and cupcake toppers for the party, make assortment of cards for card making night at Karen's for her Greece ministry trip. One of the ladies at church asked if Iwould put together a scrapbook that she wanted to give to her sister. And the list goes on.
From what I understand my mom is taking the kids saturday so I might try to knock out pop's wedding photos (300 of them), upload and make them into a book. and then I can tackle some cards. I'm really enjoying card making. It seems to be so much less stress for me. Not that I will give up scrappin my kids but I think all around this is good training. I'm teaching myself to think in layers and to think about the little details that make something so neat.


Kelly's last day is tomorrow and from what her teacher told me yesterday Kelly is having a hard time with the idea that she is going into 2nd grade but her teacher won't be there too. I was wondering if this was going to happen. Kelly does not like change AT ALL. but I know that once she gets going this fall she will have a great year. Rob and I will continue to be positive about the upcoming change.
Happy wednesday

This is me pretty much every day lately. With school getting out this week I'm already getting frazzled.

While I'm excited to have Kelly home for the summer I'm trying to come up with things to do so that they aren't killing each other by next Friday.

Wyatt is super excited about going to "Kelly's school" next year.

I have a "to do" list a mile long but don't feel like doing much of anything right this minute.

Chelsea has had a runny nose for over a week and is still trying to walk around with my assistance. I'll leave more details for the 10 month Mr. Bear post.

I think these were taken on Mothers Day. Rob was having fun and the kids were just nuts. I'm not even going to try and explain the photo speaks for itself.

My mothers day flowers. So pretty, there all dead now but i loved them while they lasted.

I have started going through and getting rid of both Wyatt's outgrown clothes and toys and also Chelsea's outgrown clothes.

In a way it's both sad and freeing. I think more it is a relief to be able to free up some space and not feel so cluttered all the time.

This is most certainly my kid or should I say Wyatt's sister. I took this just the other day and I knew I had the one of Wyatt. Might make a cute scrapbook page.

Chelsea is still being a pill right now. I will be so happy when she can start walking.

I need to get photos of her scooting across the floor. She is really starting to hall butt across the floor. Her ankle bone is red from scooting and rubbing across the tile.
Not much else going on around here. I have been playing more with my cuttlebug and it's embossing folders.
I have been making some cards and you will eventually see the gift I'm making for Kelly's teacher that she should receive tomorrow. I hope she likes it.

The heat here(100+) has been driving me crazy because it has come on so early this SPRING but on Sunday those dark clouds started coming up from the south. oohhh, it doesn't matter that it didn't rain but it was so nice not to have the blaring sun. But last night we did get some rain.

It had gotten cloudy so I took Chelsea out to swing. A few mintues later big fat drops started coming down. When it started raining a little harder I pulled Chels out of the swing and we went under the patio and watched it come down.

Already today the day has been cloudy but the heat is stil somewhat high. I'm hoping for more rain, of course.

Wow what a week.

I haven't even uploaded photos in two weeks.

I've been making cards, learning new techniques, cleaning, etc.

Chelsea is at the stage where she is rarely happy. All she wants to do is stand but that means I have to be able to sit in one spotto hold her hand. Should be easy right? Since I'm already at the computer. Except, she is tall enough that her head can easily bump into the corner of the keyboard drawer. But for the most part it is working like this. Me typing one handed while she wobbles a little beside me. If she chooses to sit her toys are right there also.

So how was your Mothers Day? We came home from church and Rob told me to relax and I finally watched Mama Mia. I think I had this cheesy grin on my face the whole time. It's been a while since I watched a musicial and to put it with ABBA music... whoever thought of this was a genius, so off the wall. The movie was kinda cheesy good and I think it would make great background noise while scrapbooking. So anyway I had a good mothers day.

Well I hope I didn't freak anyone out too much about my last post. My phone has been kinda quiet since I last posted and I haven't really known what to say. Monday was the second anniversary of Kim's death and maybe that's part of my trigger. I just miss the companionship, however toxic it was, I guess.

On to brighter thoughts, My mom, wonderful woman that she is has told me several times that I'm expensive to be around. After introducing her to the cuttlebug and all that craziness, I stumbled on a thread from the 2peas about a rolling bag for the cricut expression. Now the one the company makes for the cricut is like $80. well, leave it to the peas to find one cheaper that works just as well. I called Mom to let her know about it cause she wanted one. Without even asking her she told me to order two. They arrived last night, oh and they were $33 a piece. So for less than the provo craft tote she got two. even with shipping it was still cheaper.

Next week is our last week of school. Kind of happy but also dreading all the fighting. I'm hoping to try and keep the kids busy with crafts or practicing schoolwork.

Rob is waiting to hear if he has an interview for the Tucson Manger job for his company. He has found out that the company has also posted the job on Monster and there has been 77 other applicants but he is the only one in company that put in their resume. This is causing some great stress for Rob, which is . The person hiring for this position is also the person who has approached Rob several times about Safford, Lubbock. Rob is wondering why they seem to be so nonchalant about him in this position. He has been told to," put in your resume and we'll see what happens". So lately Rob has been short and grouchy and Chelsea still isn't sleeping through the night again, and last night was especially rough. I'm hoping and praying that one) Chelsea takes a couple of real good naps today and two) Rob gets some kind of definitive answer soon.

We were talking last night and we are both wondering where are we being lead or what are we being called to do. Example, if he doesn't get Tucson, does that mean the company is going to offer someplace else or something better at a latter date? hmm...

I could keep rambling but why??? :)

Reflections from on the mountain.

I'll start by saying that it amazes me how we have the ability to go from 90 degrees here on the desert floor, then in less than an hour the temperature is in the sixties and we are surrounded by pine trees and cool breezes.
I haven't been to our church's annual retreat since Kelly was a few months old. I must say I like them better now.
I'm not really sure where I want to start.
The theme for our retreats are becoming a true spiritual community.


A place for healing, encouragement and intimacy.
We are not your usual church retreat. We don't study a book of the bible we work on learning and teaching what it means to be a child of God.
Saturday morning in our first session the question that was asked was, "What is the message I got from my Dad"?
I have already started working on my Daddy issues in Potters Wheel and I thought I was learning and growing from that but things have a way of sneaking up on a person.
I have found that I have plenty of hurt and resentment towards my Dad and the situation he is currently in. I keep looking for the love,encouragement and protection that my Dad is not capable of giving me but that I have it in Christ. I would dearly love to go into details but I feel this is something that is between my Dad and myself.
I knew what this weekend was going to be about and I was hoping to get some counseling for other issues I'm having trouble with. (Taking a deeeeep breath)

Have you every had a thought that just kept nagging at you. You know the thought is untrue but there are some kernel of truth to it? Here is my issue.

I am afraid to have a best friend, even though my heart is crying out for one, because I'm afraid they will die on me.
Yes I know everyone dies.
Since Kim's death a couple of thoughts just keep presisting.
Kim and Natalie were two of my best friends both have died at a young age. Kristie, Nat's sister is also one of my dearest friends and she is/ has been going through some scary health issues. My friend Julie has already survived one bout of cancer. I'm afraid of getting close because I'm scared they are going to die too early.
Does this make any sense??
I guess in one way to put it simply is I feel like a weird black widow. Don't become her friend because it might kill you.
Sounds crazy huh? And I know it is but the thought keeps presisting.

I want to have those close friends that we are still getting together in our 70's.
I am that person who cheers you on, helps you out, listens and offers advice. I am a best friend, the one you call to vent with or to just hang with the girls.

I actually feel better putting this out there, it makes it less of a fear and more laughable.

So this is my most major issue i wanted to work through and find out at the core why satan keeps whispering this in my ear when I know it's untrue.
i know from typing this it shows vulnerability, it shows my true heart. My love and protection for the people I care about most deeply.
One of the things that i can offer people is my heart and satan is trying to lock that away. Makes you wonder what great things i can accomplish that satan is trying to stifle?